What makes a good carer ?

After twenty one years of caring for my wife who has Very Severe ME, I wish I could hold up my hand and say I possess all these qualities ! The experience has pushed me to my limits, exposed all my glaring weaknesses; the list below is a work in progress.

That said, it is so important to get it right - the consequences otherwise are unthinkable.

  • A willingness to listen 
  • An openness to learning
  • Patience
  • The ability to creatively respond 
  • Quietness
  • Gentleness
  • Clarity
  • The ability to speak up for the person
  • The ability  to precisely follow instruction
  • Great flexibility
  • The ability to  receive constructive criticism positively.
  • A non- judgemental posture.
  • Solid understanding that  ME is a neurological disease
  • An ability  to respond quickly and sensitively
  • Consistency
  • Deep respect
  • The ability  to see the person as well as the illness
  • The skill , courage and knowledge required to advocate effectively
  • Self awareness
  • Calmness - not easily panicked
  • Ability to make creative suggestions, when asked
  • Acceptance
  • Inner and outer peace

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